This Saturday is the Pinewood Derby Art Car show at the Pink Hobo Gallery. It’s going to be a lot of fun. Festivities begin at 7PM at 507 East Hennepin Ave.
I’ve been looking online at some of the cars that are already finished. To be honest, they look just amazing. These cars are clever, attractive, ambitious and classy. Like a really good date.
MY car is none of those things. I didn’t put nearly the time and care into my entry. I guess my car is more like a quick and easy date. In other words, it’s FAST.
Check out these slow pokes:
Mitch Loidolt’s car looks like he took a time machine, went back in time to the very first Cub Scout race, STOLE the winning car and then brought it back to 2009. Beautiful. But look at those wheels. SLOW. Next!
Kevin Cannon’s car is the car I wish I had made. That’s all I have to say. He’s a right bastard, and he can eat my dust as I race to the victory line.
Yui Tanabe’s racer looks like a real car. How do you do that? But you know what? Real cars like that are not good at racing. They’re good for driving grandmothers around. And grandmothers like you to drive slowly.
Brett Von Schlosser’s car is the kind of car a true racer like me worries about. I’m thinking he has buzz saws and an oil slick dispenser somewhere on that thing. I mean, I can see the weights under that car! That’s not regulation!
NOW take a look at my car:
My car has a face wood-burned onto it. A face! Look at how the hair is blowing behind that face. It’s because that car is so damn speedy! Plus, there are two (TWO!) coats of shellac over the entire body. That is because everyone knows: shellac=speed.
Hope to see you at the finish line, suckers!
